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Alama Gill

By Alma Gill
NNPA Columnist


Long Distant Lover

I am a 50-year-old field service engineer who travels 75 percent of the year for work. I love my job and appreciate the opportunity that I am able to travel around the world.  No, I’m not in the military, so I can pick and choose where I decide to reside long term. Basically, the problem is maintaining long distant relationships with my family, friends and holding down a love life. I try to stay in touch with my family and friends through cell phone calls and Facebook but sometimes it’s just not enough. I miss them when I’m traveling and honestly, it’s hard to maintain a healthy adult relationship with a woman without her eventually telling me I’m away too much. I’m single, active and I would consider myself to be handsome. How would you suggest I meet a woman who would understand my situation and consider being in this type of a relationship?

 Lamont in Ohio


Lamont from Ohio, yes, I’m putting you on blast, cause this is the first time I’ve run across, a truly handsome (yes girls, I saw his picture), and gainfully employed engineer with benefits, who’s discussing how difficult it is to maintain a long distance healthy adult relationship.  The first thing that comes to my mind is, “Seek and ye shall find, my brotha ~ you came to the right place, LOL.”

I’m here to agree with you sweetheart, there’s no doubt about it, long distance relationships (LDR’s) take an enormous amount of hard work, but then again, a regular in your face, every day relationship does, too. I say, navigate the negativity, as long as the two of you are serious about your commitment and devotion to each another, a LDR can be quite successful.

In my opinion, a LDR requires two mature adults who are completely confident in their own right. Each has got to be comfortable in their own skin and not looking to be completed or validated by the other. All lines of communication must remain open and honest always. You’ve gotta trust each other. That’s super important! With today’s technology options, you can keep in touch daily, practically face to face. I’m sure you’ve heard it said before, absence does make a loving heart grow fonder. Can you see it in your minds eye? Lawddy, can you imagine anticipating the next time you’ll see each other? Wheew, kool it down, this columns rated: PG, LOL. I could go on and on with the positives, but no need, I’m sure you feel me.

Evidently you’ve been looking in all the wrong places or you’d be hooked up by now. Today’s the day to steer yourself in a new direction. Start looking to find a woman who’s pursuing her dreams, occupying her time, joyfully participating in her life.  Since you’re on the road most of the time, I’m sure this task won’t be easy. Soooo, you know me, I just can’t help myself, I’ll see what I can do to help you out.  Ladies: If you’re interested in contacting Lamont, shoot me an email. I see springtime and love just around the corner.



Alma Gill’s newsroom experience spans more than 25 years, including various roles at USA Today, Newsday and the Washington Post. Email questions to: alwaysaskalma@gmail.com. Follow her on Facebook at “Ask Alma” and Twitter @almaaskalma.



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